A happy new year to you all. The Jewish people this weekend will celebrate the beginning of year 5770. This year I'm in Israel and its feels like the week before Christmas in America. There is gifts, sweets, dinners, parties, and lot of love...but more importantly time for refection on the last year. I have been doing a lot of soul searching this week and reevaluating my current position in my life. How do I see myself? What am I doing? What do I care about? How do I care about? How do I fit into a certain persona?
On the kibbutz this has been a time to see where I fit in...in a very basic sence there are three "groupings of people"
1. The Group: Try to be friendly with everyone, talk about everyone, get drunk and party, no one has a private life, your problem is everyones problem
2. The Pairs: Always together/ sometimes in the bubble/ always someone to go to.
3. The Singles: At events, but mostly in their own world. Needs to have their time/place. A few people to go to, but not all the time...serious about studying, and more mature.
I know these are just the way I see things, I'm not trying to offend anyone.
I see myself caught up in the group, trying to be a single, but longing for a pair. Back at CU, I had many groups, many friends and I was always busy. Now I'm not busy and have time for myself, if I don't get caught up in all the drama and partying. So in short, maybe this is the time for me to really look back on the past year, and say "Sweet" and then start this next year off on a different foot. Now just to figure that out.
So to update you on my last post... I think currently I'm going to stay on this Kibbutz. #1 reason...$$ but really I need some more time to figure things out. I'm looking into getting another job at the factory and maybe even another room. Its not that I don't like my roommates, but that I would just rather be with guys that I can connect to better. *Just for an example of the group think...Someone over heard me in the dinning hall talking about switching rooms, so they told my roommates, and now without me being able to talk to my roommates, they are going around to everyone saying that "Tzvi hates me, what did I do wrong, I thought he liked me, maybe its because i'm weird...ect." Well the group think then responds you are weird...so now he is pissed and depressed....AAHHHHHH! So much DRAMA and I'm not even a drama major now...what do I do?
Alright for the New Year, 5770. We should all ask ourselves what we can do. Personally I am starting off the year giving Tzdakah, Charity. Check out these two sites if you would like to do the same. They both have a large need in Colorado and have helped me out a lot in the past.
Jews at CU
Jews in Colorado
Shana Tova! May all of you have a very blessed year, full of love, peace, respect, and success!
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